No More Whoppers

We may be on vacation, but we've culled some highlights from our Earth Prime counterparts to create a Frankensteinian best of! A much more civil Alex and Ray brainstorm ideas for their fledgling podcast; Alex expresses disdain for his job and announces plans for a new business; the boys deal with portable gaming theft at a popular Mexican food chain; Ray's concern grows as a popular store threatens to open a little too close to home, and we round it out with BK news unfit for this universe! This podcast will return in All Debts Public and Primate: A Jesse Stone Mystery.

In our chilly fortieth episode, Alex and Ray plumb the depths of topics such as our favorite podemy comcasts; the public's favorite ways to mishear "Ray;" webcam brainstorming; revenge of the dentist; our talent fee; Alex naturally shares his thoughts on the upcoming Wolverine sequel; and in Overnerds, the dangers of telling strangers video game trivia. This podcast forecasts high yuletide around 4:30 PM.

In our finest thirty-ninth episode, Alex investigates a potential Looper scenario and complains about his workplace (again); the controversial 7-Eleven opens its doors to an enticed Ray; more X-Guys and a discussion of Japanimation adaptations; Nagoya's place in the national pecking order; Alex is courted by the chamber of commerce; a comparison of rural and urban Japan brings up more Sonic lyrics; a sadistic quiz game, and the Fan Fun you DIDN'T see in theaters! This podcast is the best at what it does, but what it does isn't very nice.

Our virtual thirty-eighth episode reveals our holiday plans (or lack thereof); Alex recalls the case of the missing Suikoden; new ups and downs of joblessness; Al gives us a new chapter of his dental terror *and* he gets run over; we plan to hire a supervisor; guess what X-Men and Drop Dead Fred have in common; and Fan Fun includes the giggliest donor roundup we've ever done. This podcast was specially engineered to function in zero gravity.

Our thirty-seventh episode has us still running tepid! Ray opens with some appreciation for listener concern; Alex voluntarily watches more of those X-Mans movies; a surprise visit by the NHK and Mr. Fingernails; Alex's emergency dental visit; Ray gets a Wii U and wrestles with virtual friendship, and we close it out with Fan Fun, including and a stirring Overnerd story from Ray! This podcast can be your "something borrowed."

Our peak thirty-sixth episode enters the kumite and leaves with discussion of yet another 7-Eleven update; yet another adventure in local theatre; Alex's faux pas follies; said Alex's disjointed dream journal; and a packed edition of Overnerds that includes a story of Alex's short-lived LARP past. This podcast can't be with you if you don't respect it.

Our soul-searching thirty-fifth episode opens with an ode to the tote; a sinister story of stalking by spider; Alex delivers his concession speech to the Wii U; further discussion of Game Shop; tears of joy for a new Dragon Quest on the 3DS, and then a rather serious look at depression and our own problems. We bring it back with Fan Fun, which involves crying during superhero movies! Warning: This podcast does not enable user to fly.

Our municipal thirty-fourth episode is a cavalcade of discussion: Ray reports new information from the 7-Eleven hearing; Alex reports new information about the spider web; trials and tribulations of international business; the full-bore insanity of local theater; a non-review of Wreck-It Ralph and why it's OK to cry; and Overnerds boldly goes. This podcast loves what you've done with the place.

Our breezy thirty-third episode sees Ray minus a laptop; unfortunate news on the 7-Eleven front [not really, if you listen to the next episode]; Alex's insistence on Spooky Sundays; recollection of a TV spot that may not have even happened; this week in video gaming; an update on the Yuusei situation; analyzing IGN's 'Game Shop;' Fan Fun from academia and elsewhere, including a drop submission from our youngest Alex yet! We regret to announce that this podcast has been stripped of its seven Tour de France victories.

In our splendiferous thirty-second episode, we run down many goings-on in our lives, including controversial new developments in the local 7-Eleven; tips on dodging exotic Asian spiders; how Alex prefers to eat his pasta; October readin'; the  irresistible allure of the MiFi; DQX (surprise!); terrifying tales of children's theater; cutting down on passive jerkiness on Twitter, and most horrific of all, a scatological Overnerd. This podcast should be checked by a parent for razor blades before eating.

Our blockbusting thirty-first episode opens as Alex attacks 'Just For Laughs: Gags' for no real reason; Ray's decadent power strip lifestyle; further developments on the Al-Bar; the long-awaited return of Guy Who Doesn't Understand Wikipedia; news from Astoltia; Lawson in Lawson; the enigmatic Corn Man; Alex's irrational beef with Tokyo and "wacky Japan"; further analysis of the tweeted word; and the usual Fan Fun! This podcast may be eligible for free shipping.

Our gobstopping thirtieth episode covers everything from Alex's cold, X in 10 in 10; convenience store-borne xenophobia; the horror of Al's beard; the least excited praise for Freaks and Geeks; why "old" doesn't mean "good;" and in Overnerds, ridiculous romantic advice and door-to-door marching bands. This podcast is five o'clock somewhere.

Our windswept twenty-ninth episode sees a new convenience store on the horizon for Ray; Alex journeys to Nagoya (again) for business and pleasure; Ray reorganizes his games; we really stick it to Dean Bitterman; Alex belts out a popular TV anthem; more school roleplay; news from PukaretVillage; the Sword of Remaster of NiGHTS; thoughtful potato chip discussion; game gripes, Fan Fun, and Alex almost gets washed away by a typhoon! Starting October 22nd, this podcast will no longer becarried by our nation's public libraries.

In our lascivious twenty-eighth episode, we learn about Alex triggering LMFAO's downfall; a never-before-told Homeland Week story (for good reason); new developments in Japanese kids saying the darnedest things; the true effects of energy drinks on one's temper; adventures in [setting up] Dragon Quest X; and Overnerds asks why teachers don't like cartoons. This podcast is enhanced with the power of guarana, ginkgo, ginseng, Gorby, and thyme.

Our tense twenty-seventh episode opens with tips and tricks for deep cleaning your NES; new Wii U news and concern for the future of the Jelly Man; Alex clarifies a prior screed; a return to ravaging Rifftrax and Alex reconciles with Bill Corbett; a thesis on the concept of passive-aggressive friendliness; Alex illustrates how modern gaming leaves his imagination unengaged; Fan Fun, and a *berii guddo* Overnerd! Remember to hold Reset while turning off this podcast.

In our commando twenty-sixth episode, we discuss Alex's steps forward in starting the bar; the infectious quality of LMFAO; Jesus; sanitation pickup follies; a rare non-Final Fantasy game discussion involving Silent Hill and Metal Gear Solid; an Overnerd of gaming evangelism; our best Facebook Likes so far, and at least two instances of Alex grossly misunderstanding Ray. This podcast will return in The Alvengers.

In our magical twenty-fifth episode, we celebrate with the Homeland Week Epilogue; doubling down on (some) drops; this week in Pringles; the boys' in air conditioning; the return of our favorite hater; further discussion on improv vs. scripted videos, and another installment of the acclaimed Overnerd Program! Update: this podcast has been removed from the UN's list of human rights offenders.

In this post-Homeland Week special, we present a recent recording of Alex and his dad Paul, who talks about his storied history with board games and the few video RPGs he played alongside his son. Enjoy the show, pardon the audio quality, but nonetheless, we get back to business next week!

A cliffhanger that will leave you devastated! Day 6 of Homeland Week finds our heroes reflecting on a thrilling week spent gaming and blaming; the week in food; one last round of listener thanks, our final Overnerds, and preliminary plans to do it all again next year! Collect and redeem all six episodes at any Orlando-area Exxon station to receive your FREE "Save the tiger" poster!

Day 5 of Homeland Week finds our heroes recovering from a harrowing visit to the post office; the inevitable trip to a specific hamburger-sandwich chain; shades of therapy; listener appreciation, Overnerds, and mounting excitement as Alex's dementia sets in! Please present this podcast BEFORE ordering.

It's day 4 of Homeland Week! Alex and Ray tell the tale of their eventful pilgrimage to Ikea; Alex makes headway on convincing his mom that a video game bar won't fail; listener thanks, and some of the best Overnerds yet! This podcast eats pieces of shit for breakfast.

Homeland Week: Day 3 delivers a rousing recap of the boys' gaming and burger journey; a deep look into the unblinking eye of Bad Internet; listener thanks, Overnerds, and a dramatic reading of an overcritical emai. Correctly guess the identity of the Jelly Man to be entered into our Annual Sweepstakes!

Day 2 of Homeland Week finds the boys recovering from a journey into the city; Alex's in-flight clumsiness and expert shark evasion tips, plus the requisite listener thanks! This podcast is eligible for a FREE upgrade with any Santa Fe taco shell proof of purchase.

It's Homeland Week here at the No More Whoppers compound! We start it off with Alex's travel woes before discussing video gaming in a safe, secure environment; a soundboard power struggle; long overdue listener thanks; some Overnerds to angry up the blood, and promises of more to come! This podcast can be substituted with Egg Beaters(TM) for only 29 cents.

With Alex unable to record because he's busy sipping mai tais on the deck of an extravagant beachside property (one-third true), we thought we'd use this week to give you a rare exploration of the NMW blooper reel -- a collection of promos we hoped would reel in potential sponsors. Enjoy yourselves, and we'll see you next time for Homeland Week.

Our glistening twenty-fourth episode is a cornucopia of discussion, including Fuhhh yeah, FFXI; how Dark Knight Rises may improve Alex's life; another visit from our robot pal; one of many nutty, badly-told stories from Ray's old school; our first official round of Overnerds, and we reveal our plans for Homeland Week! This podcast includes a CD-ROM with over 5,000 sports clip art images!

In our tolerable twenty-third episode, we follow up with Angelic developments; Alex loses his long-standing battle with humidity; adventures on the FFXI test server with 100,000,000 gil in party cash; Barnholt High closes its doors; the original Dr. Mario lyrics revealed; this week in gluttony with the latest BK News; Alex melts down at absolutely nothing (again); Ray rocks the world of e-literacy with book news; and the most insensitive Facebook Likes we've ever done! This podcast has been remastered from its original acetate pressings.

In our generational twenty-second episode, Ray follows up on his MiFi folly; we discuss classic food science wonders; talking about going home at a reasonable hour like two old men; new procrastination techniques; Final FUNtasy; a brief visit from a special guest; Alex gives us a valuable peek into his ancestry; good old-fashioned Japan gripes, and a new round of Facebook likes and thanks. This podcast can suffocate if placed over head.

In our tremendous twenty-first episode, Ray braves the out-of-doors and is shaken by what he finds; Alex recounts his origin after being unable to produce a certificate of live birth; the boys are left aimless in the absence of the Book Club, leading to therapy round 2; and dig down deep, because we need your nerd stories! This podcast can be equipped in both hands to deal double damage.

In our spectacular twentieth episode, we discuss the most topical of topics, including impressions of Ray's new iron; Alex's kickin' new drop; new McDonald's stories from Alex *and* Ray; Windows 7; and last but not least, the final entry in our "Top of the Rock" Book Club. No, wait, Alex wants to talk about FFXI again. This podcast just needs a buck fifty to buy a cheeseburger, man, thank you and God bless.

In our milestone nineteenth episode, Alex entertains a childhood chum until the wee hours; Ray bumbles into buying a new iron in lieu of a second 3DS; Alex dives head first into Diablo 3 and expresses excitement for future online gaming; a clarification on a Clarification; investigating whether or not we're getting more ornery; and Book Club?! You bet! This podcast enlarged to show texture.

Our independent eighteenth episode features all the NMW staples you've come to love: Alex drinkin' and ladykillin'; a segment where we keep talking about last week's stuff; Ray ranting about something game-related (specifically Indie Game: The Movie); BK News; and in Book Club, we barely pretend to care about E.R. This podcast soon to become a minor motion picture.

Our sigh-filled seventeenth episode turns out to be the real mega episode we thought we'd have last time. Ray reports back from E3 with tales of love, loss, and embarrassment for our fellow man; Alex reports back with, uh, Final Fantasy stuff; and in Book Club we discuss 'Friends' and the little blond boy who liked it a little too much. All this plus Alex pulls back the curtain on his secret life-changing (or just life-modifying) project. This podcast needs you to calm down and tell us exactly what happened in the abandoned factory.

Our sumptuous sixteenth episode reveals that Alex is now a bum (again); a triumphant return to Vana'diel; Ray's self-imposed hydration challenge; news from the gaming world leads to an examination of nerd "humor;" Wings, Frasier, and more in this week's Book Club, and more shout-outs to valued donors! This program is broadcast without commercials as part of Cable in the Classroom.

Our facile fifteenth episode opens with a disgusting act of invertebrate murder; Alex bemoans the state of outsourced bill-pay; poignant observations about Japanese naming conventions; a new segment involving violent incredulity; the fabled origin of the phrase "No More Whoppers" (!!!), and another installment of our celebrated Book Club! Are you missing Mad About You right now? WARNING: This podcast should be viewed only through special sunglasses or a protective screen.

In our sober fourteenth episode, we tackle subjects such as new computer accessories; finding time for Diablo III; Ray's garden mishap; hey, weren't those Nickelodeon shows great?!?; Alex screws everything up at work; and in our latest Book Club recap, we talk about the life of 'Seinfeld' and why everybody hated Susan. This podcast meets all OSHA standards under part 1910.25, "Portable wood ladders."

Our lucky thirteenth episode opens with some light game talk; apologies punctuated by plugs; Alex trades one smoke for another; home maintenance and other tips for country living; the tale of the indolent internet guy; a striking coincidence; nut punch torture, and the first proper installment of our Book Club! It's an Alex-heavy episode, but don't let that discourage you from clicking on every single thing in our attractive sidebar! This podcast has a 5-cent redemption value in West Virginia.

In our caffeine-fueled twelfth episode, we discuss Alex's further adventures in illness; confusing Bronson Pinchot's roles; classic television and kid komedy; confusing Brad Garrett's sexuality; yet more Final Fantasy talk; Alex's further adventures in settling in; moderately anticipating Dragon Quest X; the Week of Sandwiches; convenience store best practices; Internet humor and the podcast hosts that gripe about it, and turning the ignition on our Book Club. This podcast can get lawns looking lush in just one week.

After a brief outage, we return! Our electrifying eleventh episode finds Alex's eyes swimming in disease; Ray goes to Taco Bell; out and about in Kota and requisite Japanicana; Alex is a quitter; a sniveling round of apologies; good food quickly; Bic Camera offers to take pictures as they will last longer; Alex eats Italian food with a genial Californian; Ray proves an unwitting contestant in Alex's quiz show, and dust off that library card -- it's the No More Whoppers Book Club! Taking photographs of, with, or near this podcast is strictly prohibited.

A rookie mistake led to a terrible recording of what would have been NMW #011, but that's OK, since it probably wasn't that great anyway. Nevertheless, we didn't want to leave you in the dark, so we spend a few dozen minutes talking about what we talked about, which was mostly Final Fantasy XII again. After that, please enjoy a brief skit on the harsh realities of today's job market. See you in May!

Our tense tenth episode dips toes in such subjects as an addendum to last week's Rifftrax talk (which amounts to another half-hour segment); Alex's new apartment of spookiness and plumbing excitement; Ray's wireless mouse surplus; the No More Whoppers drinking game; Burger King's new commercial controversy; misadventures in public transportation; a bit of self-enacted marriage counseling; Alex makes a drop in real-time; and even more xenophobia talk! This podcast's eyes are up HERE, THANK you.

Our longwinded ninth episode includes Alex gearing up for his life-changing move; escalating convenience store wars; Tweet Theory continued; NewsRadio concluded; Guy Who Doesn't Understand Wikipedia; the science of riffing; Hands: the Hands of Hands; Ray contracts coconut poisoning; Alex's dad writes in, and that old icebreaker, xenophobia in Japan. This podcast soon to be a feature length animated film by Hayao Miyazaki.

In our sneezy eighth episode, we discuss where Alex is REALLY moving to; an FF9 progress update; why Alex doesn't want Ray near his family; energy drink safety; a new dramatic reading of snack food copy; school picture day, and a listener wants to know who our favorite comedians are. This podcast cannot cause death from caffeine toxicity.

Our scintillating seventh episode explores the halls of Charles Edwin Cheese and his delights; a fiery new energy drink that indirectly injures Alex; more news on the errant Italiano's impending move and its troubling lack of information; Finally Fantastic IX; goofy cars and other videoed games; up-front eikaiwa fleecing; the WNYX-Piston Hurricane connection; a second angle on Dog Whisperer-sensei, and insight into being a jackass on Twitter. This podcast can be purchased at the prize counter for 350,000 tickets.

Our sixth soft-eating episode catches up on such current events as the Game Developers Conference and the insufferable nerds within it; more Japanese misadventures with Alex; talking about NewsRadio; Ray talking much too seriously about his TV show fanpage, and our highest concentration of NBC sitcom music to date. This podcast does not rely on spell check, because it will fresh you in the end.

In our distressed fifth episode, Alex takes our drops to new levels -- very, very low levels. Then we manage to talk about Microsoft Flight, Alex's blog, Alex's moving preparations, and what The Watchtower thinks of video games and exercise. All this and moors. This podcast is an official Boeing licensed product.

Our heated fourth episode touches on issues of staying awake for a day, butler cafes, video games!!!, Kraft Milk Bites, and a conversation about Downton Abbey that expands into talk about the appreciation of old media, things we missed in childhood, and then right back to Downton Abbey. This podcast did - not - have - sexual relations with that woman.

Our sorrowful third episode begins with a round of apologies for our past transgressions, continues with Alex's "wonderful" new career news, and also includes us being mean to Nintendo nerds. This podcast was made on equipment that also produces peanut products.

In our loagy second episode, we discuss some new iPhone games (well, Ray does), our opinions on Frankie Muniz's first superhero role, Alex's French connection, and an extended period of whining about our jobs, lives, or lack thereof. (Find us on iTunes under "Sad Sacks!") This episode is dedicated to the memory of Corbin Bernsen's filmography.

In our first intimate episode, we waste no time with the typical podcast tropes: Strained references, tittering at ourselves, and thoughtful questions like: do you remember that one cereal? Can laugh tracks not suck? Do Big Macs rend your insides? Which one of us is Alex? And so much more! This episode is dedicated to all Big Bang Theory fans.